Musing of a quiet afternoon :-)

Yeah…read about BP doing the “ top-kill “ thing now, what a gamble !! What a mess it must be down there, I can’t even imagine..So, I decided that I’ve had enough of this oil rig thing, panicking about it and following every update and the best way to cool off was to sit in the breeze..Stared at the bands of clouds here and the sea of clouds there, the setting sun, the reflections,the chirping of the birds who don’t sing and the songs of the songbirds ..It’s funny, everyday I can hear so many different sounds but I can’t see all the birds…they r so in there hiding !! Still thinking about that tree, and seething because I’m yet to know it’s name ….Am I or am I not in a mess emotionally ? Well, I try to be calm,atleast on the outside and relaaaaaaax my mind - but who knows what the chemical factory in my body is upto !! What chemical messengers and signals are being released…..
Something about the clouds got me thinking about the cloudlessness of the Mojave desert.The sky was so crisp blue with the scarcity of the clouds adding to the unspoilt beauty..which although means less or no rain …and which of course makes it a desert zone !!
I was thinking about the animals and birds of that desert…not being able to spot any in the hot sun, it seems all so more mystifying to me..The trees are so thoughtfully curved out of the ground, they seemed like a piece of architecture to me !! And the flowers, oh man !! the flowers…Have you ever wondered why the birds,beasts and the flowers of the desert are so brilliantly colored, how the trees so lusciously curved ….In an otherwise somewhat dull environment compared to lush verdure, although desert is so attractive in it’s being so vast and wild, those colors are the ones adding upto the allure.
As hot and windy it was during the day, I wondered how crisp and lovely the evenings would be once the sun goes down…how about a picnic beneath the stars ?! And I know for sure that there will be lots of them, millions and millions of them…the sky being so clear, the nights must be ink-blue ~~~~~~

Adios to an affinity !!

Although it is said “ parting is such sweet sorrow “, it’s not always true…All the partings are not sweet, because most of them don’t ensure us that we’ll meet again !! We spend so much time in building up a relationship with someone, and then although it’s not lost completely, it’s lessened by a remarkable level when there is a separation…A relationship- an intricate weaving of love,thoughts,memories ..Why do we build them when we might have to lose them eventually ?

When you fall in love, you fall heels over head….And then sometimes you lose that love…You may be happy again, but you never forget !! Although time- the great healer passes over you, it doesn’t always heal and neither lets you forget…And, everytime you fall in love again, it’ll be because something in the person reminds you of your lost love…

A relationship is not always judged by the length of time but by the magnitude of feelings…And parting with someone whom you might have known for years might be sometimes easier than parting with a friend of a few days !!

Pursuit of Happiness !!

We always think that happiness is a faraway thing, something complicated and hard to get.. We look for it in the most tedious manner, drifting from the real path in this process….Yet, what little things can make it up; Have you ever contemplated what small things of life can make you smile and be happy,even for a little while ? Just to be with someone one loves, to think about special moments and days of one’s life when there was a special someone with you…..simple things like a steaming cup of tea when you are really down, a wonderful book to read-outside on a breezy afternoon, a shelter from the sudden downpour during your evening walks…wafting fragrance of an unknown spring bloom…twittering of birds, pitter-patter of raindrops, rippling of the placid lake from a falling twig…..calls of the cuckoo-the advent of spring, suddenly coming across a long-lost object in the most unlikely of places, planning a long-awaited trip, looking at the Maple turning auburn from green, bit by bit… Falling in love, waiting for that phone call in trepidation and excitement…..holding a baby in your arms for the first time, realizing that someone loves you ……All these things and myriad more constitutes the key to happiness…..These things make you happy !!

GOD + NATURE Vs MAN

Global warming and dwindling natural resources has already been successful in creating a pressure on our planet…then comes the recession-adding up to the prices of commodities, with number of jobless people on the rise resulting in lesser people who can afford to survive properly…Now, the oil spill- seafood prices will increase, fishing industry going down already,people again lose their livelihood with bans on fishing and shrimping..Nature’s way of showing that something is amiss and God’s way of showing his wrath ???????? Think about it !!

Diary of an onlooker

As I stare at those birds and dragonflies, or focus my camera onto them…they don’t have a clue that I’m trying to intrude into their private lives. For so long, the door to my balcony has been my window to the world…So many dusks have I spent, sitting in the balcony or standing on the threshold, looking out at the world as another day came to an end !! I wondered about so many things, but the most being about the beauty and peace abounding around me,at this time of the day…of the happiness I feel when I close my eyes and let the wind caress my hair….the rustling of the Sabal fans, the buzzing of the dragonflies, the tweets,chirps and varied sounds of the birds, the house swifts fluttering around and occasional sounds of the mechanical birds-on their downward flight to Fort Lauderdale airport !!

Everyone seems busy retiring in their own impassive manner. Although I’m totally slumped at this time, the retiring world out there perks me up..We are so bored with our daily mundane affairs, yet we find so much pleasure looking at the modus operandi of the birds,bees and trees…They are doing the same thing day in , day out- looking for food,breeding,looking after the young hatchlings or for the plants- growing, flowering,pollinating,bearing fruits,surviving the seasons.-Do they complain as much as we do ? Does the woodpecker get bored and tired of all the knocking it has to do for such a small bird ? Well, we’ll never know and yet we admire their daily routine and envy them for having such a beautiful life.

Now, the newfound hobbies of mine have provided me with a totally different perspective to the world outside my balcony …I appreciate the wordly chores that has been assigned to each one of us and understand that for the larger machine to go on, we have to play our parts, no matter how much of a drudgery it might be !!

The story of the dragonfly !!

There are a lot of dragonflies, flying around, this time of the yr....Since my childhood days, I always associated dragonflies with the impending rain..don’t know till this day if there is any real connection- but even today whenever I see swarm of dragonflies flying around, in my mind I think “ It’s going to rain !! “.. I have been wanting to photograph one …and just today, as I was finishing up my work in the kitchen, I saw two of them-from my kitchen window…about 150 ft away..Yeah, u can say I have sharp eyes, even with my specs..Dropping everything I was doing, I got my camera and rushed outside, went down a few stairs to get a clearer view and zoomed on to them as much as possible..It was windy and the branches of the palms were swaying too much, making it even more difficult in the zoomed situation ..Anyways, I managed to take a few photos, before they planned to change their position…and I’m happy !!

I looked up dragonflies on the net and found that like “ birding “, which I’m a great fan of, people pursue looking at dragonflies as a hobby and is called “ oding “ !! Now, isn’t that cool ?!

The bridge to the other side !!

Take me to the other side …where there is that missing romance,passion,love !! Where there is respect and eternal bliss ….take me to that land of ethereal happiness.

“If I had but an hour of love,
If that be all it’s given me.
An hour of love; upon this earth,
I would give my love to thee.”

The larger machine !!

We Live in our own ecosystem and then again we are intricately connected to the larger machine out there, the larger ecosystem !! As we think of us, our parents, our relatives, our children-born or yet to be born…of our own good and bad, we forget about the world outside. We forget to worry about the larger ecosystem which sustains us and which we belong to. We have built a nice interconnected world of our own with friends and foes , with blood and non-blood relations around us. We are constantly concerned for our well-being and to be socially accepted, to sustain this network that we have built. But in this process, are we sustainably managing our relationship with the larger machine ? Just as everything we do has an impact on our relationship with others, our actions has irreversible impacts on our world, the results of which we are already experiencing in our day to day life..When I came to know of the drought certain parts of my country has experienced last summer, when I learnt a couple of days back that the summer is already showing it’s wrath in India, I wondered…Along with feeling miserable for my near and dear ones, who have to go out everyday, without ACs in their cars, shop in stores that don’t have ACs and just live this daily life in this heat wave, I wondered - Is this larger machine showing it’s anger in this way, like someone close, someone who have been denied our love and neglected for long ? We humans, in the process of being perfect socially and otherwise, lost all connections with one of our important relatives. Now, we are to suffer the outcome …Is it too late for salvation ? Is it too late to acknowledge mea maxima culpa ??

Bloom and grow ...

Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again…where the rhododendrons and azaleas are in bloom…I am ever so haunted by this dream during this time of the year. It’s spring, time for the cherry blossoms to open up in full vigour. The eucalyptus, acacia, magnolia, jacaranda and myriads of other spring flowering trees are showing off their colors..I can see the bluebonnets dancing in the gentle wind , when I close my eyes. The Caribbean trumpet tree on the roadside are abound in intense yellow …Our childhood neighbour had one, which marked the advent of holi for us. My mind is always in a state of changing hues, and in full-blown spring during dusk hours..The world around me presents itself in so many shades during that time of the day, it’s only silly to blame my sappy mind !! I stare at the dark waters at my side of the lake and wonder at the golden magic created by the setting sun on the other side of the bank……

The Departure

The boat left, too soon, too early and I couldn’t stop it. The flower shriveled up before I could stop it …The sun set and I couldn’t save the auburn shades for myself. So many things happen in life which we can’t stop or save for later, as life itself. The moments lost are lost forever, the steps we tread today are difficult to be retraced, the smiles and laughters of today stay only in memory boxes of our minds. The seasons change and the cycle of life goes on. Twilight leads the way for the sensuous dusk…and we hope for a brighter tomorrow. We know another day will arrive and try to erase thoughts of yesterday’s apprehensions …But every departure doesn’t coincide with amelioration !! How do we cope with such departures ? How do we get over those departures that are too soon or however natural, are too difficult to bear ?